"33 Short Songs About America" is the flagship album* of a new genre of rock and roll known as SHORTCORE.** Each song is a minute or less, with the exception of "What Are You, On Rufis?", which manages to be shortcore anyway. To download the whole album as a zip file, click here. Click on the song titles below to download individual mp3's.

Not sure where to start? Start with "Nobody Wins In A Staple-Gun Fight." Then listen to "If Bad Posture Don't Get You (The Wolfman Will)." From there, you should be able to find your own way.

1. Officer Eddie
2. Rodney Dangerfield Is Like Putty In My Hands
3. Ludacris Takes His Pants Off
4. What To Do If Your Plan Doesn't Work
5. I'm Getting Tough On Crime
6. When We Were Still In School
7. Astral Projection Would Be Nice
8. If Bad Posture Don't Get You (The Wolf-Man Will)
9. My Feet
10. I've Been Rockin' Too Hard
11. What Are You, On Rufis?
12. You're Like Peanut Butter
13. Bipartisan Consensus (An Allegory On The Bush Administration's Tax Policy)
14. The Bodily-Function-Activated Household
15. Hotdogs Taste Like Hot Dogs
16. Tryin' To Be Fair To Myself (Without Hittin' You)
17. Nobody Wins In A Staple-Gun Fight
18. Trust the Carnies
19. From Inside The Beltway (It Looks Like You Suck)
20. I Don't Like the Middle
21. Gruesome Mishaps On The Highway Of Love
22. Love Is A Grapefruit
23. (You Better Quit Your) Milk-Drinkin' Ways
24. Pretty Lady Tollbooth Disaster
25. You're a Bad Senator ('Cause You Don't Rock and Roll)
26. My Baby's Got Clearance
27. I Don't Like Puddle of Mudd
28. My Concentration Is INTENSE
29. Where Do We Go When We Die?
30. Caught in the Immigration Bureaucracy of Your Heart
31. Your Parchesi-Playing Days Are Numbered
32. I Wonder What This Button Does
33. I Can't Be Your Man Cause I'm Not From San Francisco

 

* Note: if you want there to be more shortcore albums, you'll have to make them yourselves, because I'm really tired of doing thirty-second songs. Contrary to the megalomaniacal-sounding pronouncements above, I'm not trying to start a trend here; in fact, I'd prefer there not be too much more shortcore, because frankly it can get kind of jarring to listen to.

** Note 2: I don't claim to have invented shortcore, but I do claim to have subdued it.